'Target muscular calves'...

Ah, Paris in the springtime! Except - I was there for work last week, and cold, and tired, and juggling other work, and feeling somewhat jetlagged (think waking up hungry at 2am).

Still, I managed to sneak out and get some runs in along the Seine and through the Tuileries Gardens. (DC Rainmaker, who actually lives in Paris, has some good resources on where to run/bike/swim in the city.) It turns out the footpaths directly along the river do not extend all the way along both sides, so I kept having to get out onto the main roads and cross bridges and dodge traffic and run along the islands in the middle of the Seine, like a human pinball game, with little elevation changes and flights of steps here and there. The weather was kind of cool and gray so my only good photos are surreptitiously-snapped pictures of museum exhibits. Hello, Venus de Milo!

I also managed to make it to the Louis Vuitton store on the Champs-Elysees. (I was accompanying a friend who had a shopping list of corporate gifts and orders from friends back home.) Specifically, to the restroom of the Louis Vuitton store on the Champs-Elysees.

(Some context: there are a lot of Singaporeans and other folks who love to buy and brandish their designer goods, but for me it's more fascinating in an absurdist, anthropological sort of way. Did you know that when Harvard Business School researchers asked shop assistants and pedestrians to rate people entering a luxury-goods store, the women in the street thought the sharply-dressed shopper was more likely to buy something, but the shop assistants - speaking from experience - thought the gym-clothes-wearing shopper was? The idea being that the latter was confident enough in her appearance, and more likely to be a celebrity making a purchase. WSJ article here. I was not exactly wearing designer clothes, but according to Occam's razor what that should really indicate is I do not have a designer budget.)

Anyway, what I'm trying to brag about is that I managed to...use the ladies' restroom in the basement of the Louis Vuitton store. It is a totally ordinary lavatory. I may be the only Singaporean on earth to visit Louis Vuitton merely to pee.

Otherwise, this week has not been so great for me running-wise. Last week it was a little hazy, and when I tried to do my long run outdoors my chest started feeling tight. Same deal again today even though the skies were clear, so it wasn't the air quality. I have some very mild exercise-induced asthma - not officially diagnosed or drug-treated but I know what bronchospasms feel like when I have them - but it usually shows up only when I do track sprints and goes away once I sit down for a bit. It's never made its presence felt at the beginning of a slow long run. Bizarre and uncomfortable. I finished my run indoors on the treadmill and was totally fine. What gives?

In separate news, this is the single best thing I have seen on the internet all day.

This is another pretty spectacular thing from The Atlantic: The Overprotected Kid (caveat, refers to middle-class, mostly Western kids. The problem we have here in Singapore is a total lack of unmanaged play space. Or unmanaged space in general. Mm, and coddling.)

Right before I left for Paris, somehow or other this came up on Facebook:

Here's the blurb:

"Target on Muscular Calves
Say NO to pant and show your slender calves in this year, use 2B For Leg to slim up your calves! Made for muscular and edema calves!
Highly recommended by famous beauty blogger Kelly for the effect!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yMxK3pdx2cc
Special Offer in Chinese New Year!
$34 per box, exclusive in Guardian"

I still don't know what irks me most about this ad: the message that muscular calves are not attractive, the grammar, or the fact that the makers really believe it works to slim down muscular calves...
(For the record you cannot get rid of your muscles, sorry. You can get rid of puffiness and fluid build-up by elevating your legs, exercising, or putting on some compression socks. But edema can also be a symptom of something going really wrong - like kidney failure or heart failure. Okay? GET A DIAGNOSIS.)

My response to this was: 'My calves are sad you don't like them. These calves carried me through a full marathon last year, and can run 5km in under 25 minutes. I think I'll keep them, thanks!'

A very productive weekend

Race report: Venus Run 

There aren't a lot of races in Singapore that are just a 5K. Normally, a 5K is the neglected smaller sibling of some big event like a 10K or a half marathon. Or if you're a sprint triathlete, 5K is your cooldown. So I always leap at the chance to take part in an event that's SOLELY a 5K, because when it's well-organised, a 5K race really has a chance to shine.

The all-women's Venus Run is held to mark International Women's Day. It was held on Saturday for the third time (see last year's race report when I did it for the first time), and at Marina Barrage again. The route was changed up slightly - last year's race ended with a very painful climb to the Barrage rooftop, while this year's painful climb was in the middle!

route goes up that wide arm of the spiral, and down the other side

It's organised by the Singapore Athletic Association, and sponsored by compression-gear company X-Bionic, which gave us a really spiffy-looking and probably highly-engineered...but potentially somewhat hot...shirt.  I'm glad the shirt now says 'Diamonds aren't my best friends...Running is'.  I quite like the shirt, even with all the logos, and it will probably stand me in good stead the next time I go cross-country skiing...

So, only 5k? Let me tell you, there is nothing 'only' about racing a 5K. I'm not a speedster at all, and I've painfully clawed my way to every PR minute by minute. I'll take 800s over sprints at track any time. And I'm still a chicken; I don't push myself till I totally blow up. So...why did I sign up for this? I had a good time last year. And I wanted to find out if those track workouts have had any effect.

I walked to the event site from Bayfront MRT. It's about 1.5-2km, and I know all the shortcuts because I've run this dozens of times, but a small investment in shuttle buses from Marina Bay MRT would be really nice. One photographer stationed near the Flower Dome gave me a thumbs-up and I gave him a grin.

I didn't take advantage of this, but I noticed folks with cold drinks and ice cream? fro-yo? before the start. Extra bonus points! I once had a delayed tri wave start at 9am and almost died of dehydration because there was no access to fluids beforehand.

After bag drop (2 minutes), I excuse-me'd my way to a few rows behind the start line, shoulder to sweaty shoulder with loads of other runners. Apparently some 4,400 runners took part. And here I thought it was a smallish race. Normally I'm a prerace Oscar the Grouch, but I was in a good mood, and all the enthusiasm was infectious, even if I was too tightly packed in to do the Zumba warmup. Clearly the organisers were sprinkling pixie dust on the whole thing.

The gun went off and we flooded out; I immediately got stuck behind a couple of people, passed them, traded places with a few others, and then suddenly I'd run the first km in 4:26 (there's that starting-too-fast problem again). The next km flew by, as did a turnaround. Past the first (only) drink station of the race, and then we were heading up to the rooftop of Marina Barrage.

Afterwards, I did hear a couple of complaints that the only water point was at 3++ km on a very hot day. I don't even think to drink during a 5K, but for new runners this could be a bit of an issue. (Something for race organisers in general: Keep in mind that a race experience can be very, very different for the podium finishers and the 1 per cent, vs the 99 per cent; organisers should try their best to ensure that everyone, right down to the last person, has a good experience. Also keep in mind that the 99 per cent pay 99 per cent or more of your race entry fees.)

Going up the Marina Barrage Spiral of Doom.  

I saw Holly and her cheer squad here -

Holly & Zun. Best sign ever, so many people took photos with it! 

 - and before I could yell anything at them (heard someone yelling 'Go Grace', Tekko or Holly was that you?) we were heading down the other 'arm' of the spiral and across the dam itself. I'm pretty sure I began to slow down here, and was passed by a couple of women. Then another turnaround, back across the dam, and back towards the end point.

Thanks to a wonky distance marker that I now realise was *definitely* not at 4km, I thought I wasn't going to make it under 25 minutes. But as I rounded the corner I realised the time on the clock read 24:42, and charged into the finish for a total time of 24:50somethingorother...

A couple of friends with GPS watches confirmed that the race wasn't short, and so I am now the owner of a shiny new 5K PR - a PR that is almost two minutes faster than my last one (26:40 some time in the distant past). And between the heat (30 degrees C at 5pm), the headwind and the spiral of doom this was a tough, tough run. So that PR is legit, hooray! Update: chip time was 24:50 with no puking involved, I'll take that as a success. 

At the bag drop I ran into national rower Saiyidah Aisyah, and chatted with her while we waited to get our bags.
'You run as well as row?' I asked. It turns out she runs for cross-training, typically about an hour at a go. The 5K was painful, she said - 'It's like sprinting all the way!'. Now, she's in training for the Asian Games in August. (And then the Commonwealth Games, and then the Olympics, I hope. Super cool.)

Generally, the race site was well laid-out, with no inconvenient crisscrossings or snarls. The route might have involved a giant Barrage spiral climb of doom, but I'm glad it was at 3.5k this year instead of the finish line like last year (which is nice mentally, because you know that you're done as soon as you finish the climb, but not so great for race atmosphere because more people can fit on the ground than on the roof). So yeah, I'd do this again next year. Just put the distance markers in the right place.

Extra bonus points for:
- Plenty of COLD water and sports drink BEFORE and after the run
- Taking feedback about last year's shirt!
Minus points for:
- Bag drop folks being totally unable to find my bag for something like ten minutes while a queue built up behind me and I began to freak out; finally I went round behind the counter and told them 'please just help the people behind me, I'll look for it myself'. Time taken to find bag: 30 seconds.
- Not sure why, but it took the organisers a full week to put up official results and timings, and not even the full downloadable list at that.

Mega thanks to: 

- Holly for cheering

- The Running Shots team for the pix  

Let's get some shoes: the Mizuno Wave Hitogami 

On Saturday afternoon, before the Venus Run, I also popped in to TRG to get the shoes that are going to see me most of the way through this year's marathon cycle. The New Balance 1400v2 was out of stock in my size, so Wille suggested the Mizuno Wave Hitogami, because they're very similar. Both have a 9mm heel drop, a soft non-plasticky upper, and a wide toe box. The Hitogami looks like it won't have the problem I had with the NB1400 (peeling overlays) though, which is nice.  

source: http://wemakerunningcool.com/2014/03/05/new-arrival-mizuno-wave-hitogami/

Aren't they blindingly gorgeous? This morning I ran an easy 12k in them. Very comfortable - my feet felt at home straight away. Must save them for last few long runs and marathon. 

These guys were also in the shop while I was trying on shoes. They're doing a very, very long run through a very hot, dusty desert to raise money for animal rescue charities. That's dedication. Folks are amazing! 

Miscellany 

My life isn't all about running though; this afternoon I made... 

Chilled cucumber-celery soup

1 large cucumber

3 stalks celery 

1 tablespoon lemon juice

A good pinch each of coriander seed powder and cumin powder, to taste 

1/2 tsp salt 

1 clove garlic

1.5 cups Greek yoghurt 

1 tbsp mayonnaise 

1 tbsp olive oil 

Put everything in a bowl and blend with hand blender or food processor. Allow soup to chill out in fridge before serving. Makes 2 large servings or 4 small ones.

I just made sugar cookies (am still wavering on whether or not to top them with caramel sauce - maybe they're sweet enough), and I'm going to make fried tofu and tuna onigiri for dinner tonight. Lucky husband. (He does the dishes. Lucky me.)  

Next up: Marathon training for Gold Coast begins this week. Also, if you're doing the Twilight Ultra challenge, I'll be volunteering, come and say hi! 

From the department of sensible decisions

Some facts:

1. I woke up on Monday with pain - everything sore to the touch - across the top of my right foot near the outer toes. And a line of pain that follows some muscle or tendon all the way down my outer lower leg. And a tight calf and ITB. I suspect extensor tendonitis. Bizarre. Bodies are like voodoo. (Maybe it is time to invest in that gait analysis after all.)
2. The pain continued till Wednesday so I haven't run since Sunday. I type this sitting on the floor and foam-rolling while having my morning coffee. Except I don't know what portion of me to foam-roll first. I'm going to try running later today.
3. My right foot is not the foot that I semi-sprained on Sunday while running to the end point of the 2XU half marathon to meet my dad. That's my left one. I am supremely sprain-prone (despite a lifetime of desperate stability exercises). If there is a hole in the pavement, my ankles are guaranteed to find it.
4. On Sunday I had my last successful run: 13 easy km to and around the 2XU end point...and then went home and hauled my husband out of the house to run 5 tempo km with me, which hurt and was hot but went by much faster with him than without.
5. Here is a picture of me with SuperDad, who ran the 2XU half. Remember how my parents are my running role models? When I am 58 I want to still be running, too.

6. Unfortunately I am supposed to race a 5K this Saturday (don't know if that's happening, gah) and a half marathon in late April (probably still happening; I have six weeks to train for it).
7. I leave you with a picture of a Trojan Horse.

YES THAT IS A HORSE ON WHEELS.
It was just sitting along the 2XU route, about 2km from the finish. At this point I was running with a friend for the last few Ks, trying to drag her to the finish line in one piece, and I just had to run across the road and take this photo. I didn't want to get too close though, just in case hordes with swords came swarming out of its belly.
I'm pretty sure it's just left over from Chinese New Year though. I hope.

Update: Thanks guys! I ran four tentative km this morning and the foot + leg were fine, if a little tight. I'm going to keep on foam rolling, icing, and stretching prophylactically, and Saturday afternoon 5K will probably be all right. Phew.

After my run, I also did a 'HardCore' class at the gym, which seemed to be a general bootcamp-style sort of fitness class that included lots of agility exercises like box jumps and burpees, and core exercises like planks. Hilariously, the warm-up consisted of running in circles around the studio for five minutes. It wasn't a terrible class - I probably need to be doing some of those things anyway -  but not my cup of tea; I don't really have patience for general fitness classes and I would like to be doing runner-specific things for runner-specific reasons.

More things for you to read!

Brunch date, his and hers edition 

The husband had to ID some trees for work, and he is not a tree expert at all (more of a working-out-what-things-are-from-satellite-images-expert), so we had a nice walk in the park a couple of weeks ago with a tree guidebook.

That's not a ridiculously tiny backpack, it's a ridiculously tiny pack full of extremely high-tech GPS equipment.

Note to self: when on tree-identifying date, it is advisable to have TWO copies of the tree book instead of one person sitting around checking their phone while the other flips frantically through the book to find said tree.

Earlier this year I talked about all the things I'd love to get done for the year. Reading lots more is one of them. My library card has been getting a lot of exercise lately; here are some of the things (both online and off-) that I've been getting stuck into.

Pure comedy gold - 'Awful stock photos of women running' (stock photos tend to be awful in the first place, stock photos of women even worse, stock photos of women running...well let's just say at least they're not stock photos of women running while eating salad and laughing.)

Google Translate for runnerspeak - slightly more relevant only to the 1 per cent, aka people who are actually, competitively looking to get on a podium, rather than the 99 per cent of us, but amusing nonetheless.

Floating City by Sudhir Venkatesh (that's the book you see in the brunch photo up there)
Sudhir Venkatesh is the erstwhile University of Chicago sociologist who became famous when he contributed to 'Why do Drug Dealers Still Live With Their Moms?' in Freakonomics. Floating City is a study of what makes New York City tick, which of course is an enormous question. The result wasn't too surprising or revealing, given what we know of New York as a place for people to invent and reinvent themselves continually. Anyway, if you liked this, I'd recommend Katherine Boo's 'Behind The Beautiful Forevers' or Robert Neuwirth's 'Stealth of Nations'.

Arcadia by Jim Crace
I hadn't really discovered Jim Crace before reading Harvest, which was on last year's Booker shortlist. These things can best be described as fables both timeless and contemporary. (A few people on Goodreads said Harvest was historically inaccurate, but they were missing the point. I will say the characters in Harvest were not as compelling as those in Arcadia, though.) There's something about Crace's prose - it's blank verse, poetry simmering beneath the surface, waiting to burst into flame. Enjoyed this one v. much.

That's a lot of reading. But what about running? 

Well, on Saturday I did an interesting sort of long run: 6km trying not to go too fast (so 6:30-7:00min/km with great effort), 4km of painful tempo run interspersed with 2km of grouchy walk breaks around Pandan Reservoir in full-on sunshine and heat, and 6km very slow (had to get back to where I started ouch ouch ouch).

I think this progression run stuff needs more work.

Oh, and I'm thinking of another winter marathon this year. Winter Down Under, that is. The Gold Coast Airport Marathon is in July, and it's a fan favourite among Singaporeans because it's cold and flat. I mean, cold and flat...what more can you ask for? 

Race report: Marina Run

I'd done this fairly no-frills evening half marathon in 2011, and DNFed due to stomach trouble. But I trust my friends' race recommendations, and Adrienne had had a good time at this one. So I signed up...and then she wasn't able to make it on race day thanks to a janky foot. Here's to sensible life decisions: rest today to run again another day!

I am not good at sensible life decisions.

Hang in there guys, it's going to be a longish one.

Race pack collection: Packet pickup was a breeze - in, out, done in 2 minutes on a Sunday afternoon. Bonus points for offering same-day packet pickup for runners visiting from overseas!
This race also had 10K and 5K fun run options.

The race pack: I don't really notice what's in the race pack so long as I get a bib and a shirt and a finisher medal at the end, but I know some of my readers do. This race pack was pretty dismal (at least for Singapore and for a run that I paid $50!! for): a bunch of flyers, including one for car servicing and one for air-conditioner servicing, and duplicate flyers for children's soccer birthday parties and gym lessons and watches.
There was one coupon for a massage, WHICH YOU BET YOUR ASS I am going to use, and one for an either-or spa deal: a facial or a 'slimming wrap', neither of which I really want, especially because the latter sounds like a poorly filled burrito.

Race site: The race site at Gardens by the Bay East is convenient only if you live at one of the Tanjong Rhu condos. Otherwise, it's about 1km from the nearest MRT station (Stadium). Walking about 1+km to and from the nearest MRT station is not a huge deal for me, but if this was my first half marathon, it might have been somewhat upsetting, I guess.

I went down with my neighbours Aicha and Peter, who were also running and supposed to meet their friend at the medical tent to give her a race pack. Turns out the medical tent was definitely not where it was supposed to be on the map. Thumbs down.

Baggage deposit and pick-up: When we got there, the bulk of the 10K runners were just finishing, and there was a  horrifyingly long queue for baggage pickup. There were definitely not enough people manning the baggage pick-up booth, probably because some of them were handling half-marathon bag drop. Apparently some of the 10K runners waited in line for half an hour, ABSOLUTELY the last thing one wants to do after running 10K, thank you very much.

Fortunately when I finished, the queue for medal, apple, and water was fast, and I made a beeline for bag check. The queue for baggage...well, I probably stood in line for maybe 5 to 10 minutes.

By the way, race organisers: you know what would be really nice? Just hand us a little prepacked box of food so that we don't have to juggle apple and medal and banana and water etc etc, because ain't nobody got enough hands for that nonsense. One more thing - it would also be nice to have more water at the finish area instead of only at the finish chute.

The route: Two loops of out-and-backs, not particularly exciting, but quite pretty because you go around Marina Bay and a little way up the Kallang River and you get to see everything lit up at night. Not bad!

And now...*drumroll*...The run: 
So after a terrible week at work, I promised myself I would do this as a long run, a kind of reward for making it through the week. Of course I was very bad and didn't keep that promise - more on which later.

There were about a thousand half marathoners, which is really, really small for Singapore! It was crowded for the first couple of km or so, but not too bad after I'd sorted myself out. (I tend to try to get out of the crowds right at the start, but this often spells trouble - here's why.) Later edit: I forgot to count the veteran half marathoners! That means there were about 1,500-1,800. Sorry. Still really really small for Singapore, though.  

I could feel myself going too fast right at the beginning, and was desperately trying to slow down, but my legs seemed to be beyond my control. The angel on one shoulder said: "What are you doing? Stop passing people and rein it in now or else you'll die later." The demon on the other shoulder said: "But you feel fine *now*." In the end my shoulders were inexplicably sore so they must have been slugging it out pretty hard.

So what did I do? Of course I went out too hard for the first 11 or 12km. (What? Nothing hurt. Yet.) There was another woman on my shoulder and we kept trading places; I could hear her breathing quite hard next to me, which was quite distracting; I know she couldn't hear whether I was breathing hard because she had headphones in!

Somewhere around 14km I began to regret my initial burst of speed because I suddenly felt like my legs were made of lead. I kept thinking 'just keep running, just keep running'... My pace definitely dropped a bit here, and at this point I just slowed down to relax and enjoy the night air. The woman with the headphones overtook me and all I could do was glare at her back.

On my second loop, one of the drink stations ran out of water and was apologising: "Sorry, we only have isotonic drink left" - a nasty purple, grapey-smelling stuff. From the way it smelt I half expected it to glow. You had better not run out of water, especially when I'm in the middle of the pack and I know there are plenty of people coming along after me. (A note: When I first started doing half marathons I was so slow that some of the drink stations really did run out of water. So now I always, always, always carry my own for any race over 10K.)

At the 18k mark I somehow summoned enough energy to hammer (ok, only in my dreams; in reality I'm quite sure I looked like a spastic rhinoceros) the last couple of k's home.

I finished in about 2:15, which is where most of my half marathons seem to be these days, and with no ill effects but a pair of sore feet. My half times remind me of my 10K times, which were stuck firmly at 1 hour++ for a very long time until an abrupt and totally surprising breakthrough a couple of years ago. So maybe there's a half breakthrough in the offing somewhere within this lifetime!

My team-mate Claire who ran it as well said the course was a bit long; I still don't own a GPS watch so I'm just going to believe her.

After cooling off I found myself totally encrusted in salt - gross. Good thing I packed and ate my good old shot blocks throughout or there would have been blood. I mean cramps.

At the finish line, Jimmy found me and we set off for food and home. By now it was 10pm and NOW I was famished, so we popped into Burger King. Sometimes you just need a large iced Milo after a race. And sometimes you need a large iced Milo and a nap; I nearly passed out.

The verdict: You all know I really have only two key criteria for a race: Does it start on time? (yes) and Is it the right distance? (no) -- I'd give this one a grade B. Maybe some extra marks for scenery and a relatively thin crowd.

Anyway, I think I've learnt my lesson. The real test is the Run350 half in April, a race for which I actually have goals. You know, like goal number one: don't...start...too...fast. One day I'll be sensible.

I also think I need to do a couple of things in training:
- One, a long run or two with 7 or 8 tempo km in the latter half. Or some sort of progression long run in which I start slooow (an important lesson in reining it in) and work up to finish off at 10K pace.
- Two, aside from one angel and one demon sitting on my shoulders (those guys need to lose some weight), in all seriousness why are my shoulders sore? I have to figure out what to do to fix that.

An update: Results are out. Discovered my team-mate Claire was FIRST - well done her!

What are these mystery 'lap 1/ lap 2' points - what distances are those anyway? 3km? 4.2km? 5km? 10??? Annoying. Race organisers, please don't do this.

Epilogue: Cheer report, Metasprint Aquathlon

I had somewhat ambitious and extremely optimistic plans for Sunday morning: do a recovery run around Sentosa and cheer friends on in the Metasprint Aquathlon there. But we got home at 11.30pm, and by the time I showered and got into bed it was midnight.

Naturally, my body had other plans. I woke up at 8am, but Shirlene's wave was at 8.35 - not going to make it on time for the start, could I get there on time for the finish?

I got there at 9.15 - eek! - and thought I'd missed her, so I wandered around looking for her ('maybe she's cheering her husband out of the water?')...and missed her coming through the finish. When I turned around again she was standing there (sweaty hugs!) and we cheered Eugene and his friend Aylwin in. Those two are not only very competitive with each other, they're also training for a half-Ironman in May, so after Eugene and Shirlene got home...he turned around and went out to run for an hour. I have no idea how people do it. Training to run takes up enough of my time.

What are your best ideas for 70.3 cheer signs? I suggested Shirlene stand at T1 with a sign that read 'ONLY TWO MORE SPORTS TO GO'. ("Trolls," said Eugene, shooting us a dirty look.)

a short note about a long run

I'm really looking forward to tonight's half marathon. Especially after the madness of this work week in which things happened or didn't happen or fell through or got arranged or rearranged and came at all of us from every which direction at once. A week in which, for three days, I saw my own husband awake for a sum total of ten minutes. A week in which I didn't get remotely enough sleep until last night. All that accumulated stress is waiting in my legs to be pounded out, the heavy fuzziness in my head to be dissipated, the monkey on my back shaken loose and sent floating off into the sky over Marina Bay. I'm looking forward to a nice quiet long run tonight, in the darkness of the gardens at night, just me and the wind and my watch.

Once, in JC, I was on a school trip to climb Mount Kinabalu in East Malaysia. The way most people do it is you spend one day climbing halfway up, overnight from about 4pm to 3am at a lodge midway, and summit and come down the next day so you can see the sunrise at the summit. In the wee chilly hours of the morning, as we were trudging blearily in silence up the path towards the summit, I turned around and saw a long line of headlamps and torches twinkling in the darkness all the way back to the lodge. And in the magic of that single moment I forgot how cold and out of breath and weary I was. Just me, and the wind, and my watch.

You may be a runner if...

You know. Sometimes we have doubts about these things.

Here's a handy-dandy guide: Are you a runner?

You may be a runner if...

- You have Very Strong Opinions about shorts vs capris and when and where to wear each.
- And about running with, or without music.
- Your laundry contains more sports bras than regular ones.
- You own more sports bras than regular ones. (...ahem. guilty as charged...)
- Saturday morning long-run planning begins on Friday afternoon.
- Yours are the grimiest shoes in the gym. (What is this 'indoors' business?)
- Don't even get me started on shoes.
- You have planned at least one holiday around a race. (Hello, Tokyo Marathon! And Perth City To Surf!)
- You get annoyed when someone calls it 'jogging'.
- You don't NEED coloured cornstarch, zombies, or lightsticks to enjoy running, but will jump in for 'colour runs', 'zombie runs', or hen party runs with friends for a nice social affair
- You get more excited than your best friend about her upcoming first 5K.
- This is a real problem:

- You run. As in, you put one foot in front of another at a speed faster than your walking pace, putting some real effort into it, and you do all of this deliberately, day after day, of your own volition...and you enjoy it.

Any more suggestions?

---

I haven't blogged for three weeks - sorry, internets - and suddenly I have my very first race of 2014 coming up this weekend: the Marina 21K!
This was the one I ran into gastric trouble at two years ago and DNFed. Ow.
It starts at 7.30pm though so I haven't decided whether I'll fun-run it or race it. My circadian rhythm doesn't really like running at night, and my 13h/day work schedule this week isn't the most conducive to resting. But I feel fine, speedwork has been going well, I've been good about strength and stretching, and I've been quite consistent about running ~40km/ week since the Standard Chartered ekiden in December. So who knows?

I leave you with the highlight of my last weekend run:

Bad idea: running 12.5km after sleeping for 4.5 hours following a wild house-cooling party at a friend's house. (The difference between parties in your early 20s and parties in your late 20s: at the latter, not only does no one question your choice not to drink alcohol - which I don't at all for medical reasons - but they support you, no one pressures you to drink, and the host offers you tea.)
Good idea: running 12.5km to Sentosa
Bad idea: running to Sentosa via the Southern Ridges (what goes down must come up; I had to stop and walk on Mount Faber)
Good idea: OH HELLO MR MERLION

Let's talk about pain

The other day, I ran around Macritchie with Rachel, and then we sat down to breakfast. Rachel is training for the Tokyo Marathon so part of our conversation went something like this.

- When you run a marathon, is there a point that everything starts to hurt?
- Yeah, my feet hurt, knees hurt, quads hurt, everything hurts. But it's normal pain. Not bad pain. You just gotta deal with it. (Pause) Do you realise that only another runner would understand exactly what I mean?

We both burst out laughing. It's true - there are so many different kinds of pain, and runners understand exactly what the difference is.

But let's talk about pain.

In general there are two kinds of problems that runners have with pain:

One, more common to beginning runners, is not understanding the difference between good pain and bad pain.
At last year's Standard Chartered Singapore Marathon, one of the taglines on the posters was 'Brave the Pain. Celebrate After.' And experienced runners complain all the time - 'That track session hurt but it was so good.'
This can actually be dangerous to less experienced runners listening in, and lead them to do some crazy stupid things. I've heard of people doing a 30k while they're still recovering from a flu. Going from nothing to marathon or ultra in too short a time frame. Doing a marathon - even though they're generally fit - with no training, thinking that pushing through the pain is heroic.

But here's the difference.

Good pain is: Doing a long training run and needing to foam-roll out all the dull muscle aches afterwards. Or: strength training and aching gently in places you didn't know existed. Or: when the yoga instructor says 'now open up your hip just a tiny bit more'. Or: 38km through a marathon; everything is sore from all the pounding, but you know you're not going to injure yourself and you're on track to PR if you just push a tiny bit more. Or: you hurt all over the day after a hard workout, but you know it'll go away in a day or two. Good pain is never the goal, never a bragging right. Good pain is pain in service of a larger goal.

Bad pain is: Sharp bright pain just below your kneecap when you run, as though the padding has worn down and something is grinding away inside. Or: when your calves are abnormally tight and wound up, like a too-tight guitar string, and you need to stretch at every stop light but even the stretching hurts. Or: being undertrained for a long race. Or: 12km into a marathon and every step sends pain shooting up your leg. Or: two weeks after you sprain your ankle, it still twinges when you land wrong. Or: pain that doesn't go away even with rest and reduced intensity. It's psychological too: bad pain is the pain you flaunt trying to show off how tough you are.

There comes a point when fighting through the pain isn't brave, it's stupid. And that depends on whether it's good pain or bad pain. Experience will help; no one but you can tell you what kind of pain you have. Knowing which is which can make all the difference.

This is why I hate 'fitspo'. Which is a whole nother conversation for another day.

The other sort of problem, endemic among experienced runners, is not listening to your pain.

Yeah, I have a problem with this too. I know running gives you a buzz like almost nothing else. I know how addictive that buzz can be. I know no other exercise is quite the same. One of my running friends is suffering through a nasty bout of plantar fascitis and the psychological damage is worse than the physical misery.

Most people who've been running for a while know the difference between good pain and bad pain; whether today's pain means tomorrow's gain or tomorrow's DNF. Your pain is trying to tell you something. But you've got to actually pay attention to it and take responsibility for yourself, or you're in as much trouble as someone who doesn't know which kind of pain they have.

I love this.

credit: http://legit-fitness.tumblr.com/

Another year, another age group

This year is a bit of a daunting year for me.

Why? It's the year I move up into the dreaded 30-34 age group. There may be eleven months to go before I turn 30, but triathlon directors don't care. (So heartless. Those women are fast.) That may or may not be part of why I haven't decided on the annual triathlon yet. I'm not a real triathlete, just a runner who pretends to be one now and then.

Either way, it got me thinking about a few other things I'd like to do this year - both running- and non-running-related. Some of them are realistic. Some of them are more aspirational.

I'd like to...
- volunteer at a race - YES! If you're running the Twilight Ultra Challenge, come and say hi. I will have gummy bears (not these ones don't worry)
- race a distance that I've never run before (that can be 6k, 12k, 15, 30...50???). Instant PR!
- trail run at least once a month
- run Punggol Waterway again! - DONE! Fine, that was last year on Christmas Day. It's still pretty.
- run my first ultra (any distance longer than 42.2...and I have a particular event in mind!)
- run a 25:00 5k
- run a 55:00 10k
- commit to one strength/ conditioning class and one pilates/ yoga/ other 'body awareness' class at the gym once a week (it's like medicine for me - I haven't the patience to do this on my own and therefore need a class to kick my butt)
- go paddleboarding more. I tried this last year and it's great fun. ('Learn to surf' is on my not-so-secret adventure bucket list, and I figure getting used to standing on a floating board is a good place to start.)
- go on a bike ride longer than anything I've ever done before. Enjoy it.
- hike in Hong Kong again
- swim with the whale sharks in the Philippines
- visit Italy
- try five new foods or restaurants this year (visiting Italy might help with this...)
- keep a log of the books I read all year - and yes, that includes the trashy mysteries. YES! Inspired by Angela over at SF Road Warrior, I'm actually doing this. You'll get the occasional book review here, too! I'll also be rereading Annie Dillard's 'Pilgrim at Tinker Creek' and reading all of the 2013 Booker Prize shortlist.
- finally complete the Udacity course I'm taking, in very, very basic Python. (No, 'basic Python' was not a bad nerd pun.)
- make some progress on one of the passion projects I have for work
- complete two more Coursera or Udacity courses (please recommend!)
- camp out on a beach and watch the sun rise. While not moving. Usually when I see the sunrise it's because I'm running towards it.
- learn to be still.

Anyone have any other suggestions?

In defense of disgusting gym clothes

I've mentioned it here, but I recently joined a gym to help with one of my New Year's running resolutions: focus on strength and stretching. I am phenomenally lazy, as you all know, and strength workouts done at home tend to go this way: I get the mat out, lie down on the floor, spot a dust bunny, go and grab the broom, clean it up, do a few squats, noodle around on the internet looking for a better playlist, do a few more, decide that my floor still isn't clean enough, and then it's time to pack it in for the day. When it comes to strength work, I am not the most motivated person.

So it slooooooowly dawned on me that I could just go to classes like Body Pump and Pilates and be done with it in a couple of hours a week. Yes, it's a rather expensive way to force myself to keep that resolution but I'll keep the resolution precisely because I'm spending good $ on it. (Economists? Anyone? What's the term you use for that? Jeano?)

In any case, I promptly discovered the existence of people who wear false eyelashes and eyeliner to the gym. I couldn't tell if one woman was coming from (why wouldn't you take your makeup off?) or going to a party (don't false eyelashes come off in the shower or have they stuck on with superglue? a friend enlightened me that there exists eyelash superglue. phew).

I'd say most people at the gym I joined are fairly serious about their workouts, though. But boy, do they dress nice. I went for one yoga class in shorts and a tech t-shirt from a race and felt a bit out of place among the people with the stretchy capris and tank tops with an intricate, inordinate number of complicated straps.

And so I read 'In Defense of Disgusting Gym Clothes' and the cutting, hilarious 'Refining the Fitness-Gear Trend' (it's from NYT's Critical Shopper, a section I rarely read, but a column about workout wear? Bring it.) and had a great chuckle.

From the former:

Here are my requirements for gym clothes: clean, comfortable, and suited for the activity. Your requirements are probably similar. It is unlikely you need fancy gear to use a treadmill. Windbreakers that wick sweat, neoprene layers, and aerodynamic running pants are irrelevant. Besides, most of today's trendy gym clothes sell themselves on aesthetics rather than performance. 

I like nice gear, and a new pair of shorts or shoes can be an excellent motivator. But I take her point. I wear tech shirts because they work, and choose shorts or tights that don't chafe, keep me (relatively) dry, and are comfortable (I'd rather run in a body-hugging tank top that doesn't flop all over the place when it gets soggy, than a baggy shirt that I have to wring out). I never skimp (pun not intended...or maybe???) on a good sports bra. So I get that capris are much more comfortable to do a split in, and you don't horrify everyone when you stick your legs up in the air.

But marketing is aspirational. Trendy gym clothes are not going to make you look like the models in the catalogues. Most of us buy ripstop nylon hiking trousers and dream about adventures that we never take, or complicated tank tops and dream about being able to hold the yoga pose the model is doing. Gear won't get you there; you will. No pair of running shorts is going to make you faster; you are going to make you faster.

But I think the bigger point here is simply not to judge. (Yes, I've seen running and fitness bloggers judge, too - judge women runners for being vain, judge runners who are faster, judge runners who are slower, judge people for running too far, judge people who are not running far enough, judge people who may have different value systems for being arrogant, judge women who lift hard, judge women who don't lift hard, etc etc ad nauseaum ad infinitum zzz.) The gym is a dense urban environment; there are always other people around and there will always be someone who is dressed nicer than you and someone who looks like they wore that t-shirt to sleep. (I reserve the right however to snicker a bit at people who wear full-length compression tights for a short weekend run, unless those are your only running pants.)

More importantly, and harder yet, don't feel like you're being judged. Most people at the gym probably aren't judging you either. They're just there to work out and do their thing - whether that's 'run hard until you're a sweaty puddle' or 'look cute to motivate yourself while working out'. And the ones who are judging you, well, aren't you're old enough not to give a shit?

On a similar but more serious note, here are two more things I enjoyed reading.

Miss Zippy: Trends I'd Like To See End in 2014
and
Fit and Feminist: Moving away from the cult of the body in 2014

From the latter:

I’ve seen holy wars break out over Paleo/primal/vegan/fruitarian ways of eating. I’ve seen smugnoms tell people with cancer that they wouldn’t be in this situation had they just avoided meat and processed food.  I’ve seen people try to recast cruelty towards fat people as something intended to help them.  I’ve seen people who can barely articulate a coherent thought brag about spending three hours a day in the gym.  I’ve seen fitness and nutrition professionals basically use their platforms to inflict their disordered lifestyles on thousands of adoring followers. I’ve seen people wield their healthy lifestyles and their fit bodies as clubs with which they beat the heads of lesser mortals who may not have visible abs or who might have boxed food in their pantries.

The take-home point: You are more than your body. You are your beliefs and mind and values as well, and all these things matter as much or more than whether you can achieve a six-pack. I would like to lead a more interesting life than it being all physical perfection all the time. And again, judge not and don't give a rat's ass that you're being judged either. Discuss.

Year-end reflections, or just week-end ones

- I thought I'd better put up this post while it's still 2013.

- 42! It's the meaning of life. It's also the number of kilometres in a marathon (give or take a bit) and the number of kilometres I ran this week (give or take a bit). It's a good number.

- Christmas came and went. I worked on Saturday and will be working New Year's Day, but Christmas Eve was spent with family, Christmas Day with friends and family and board games and long run and pie. Quality time.

I ran 14++km with Rachel (+1 if you count sprinting to the MRT station and THROUGH the MRT interchange to get to Sengkang on time because I live on the other side of the island) and it turned into an impromptu road+trail run because part of the Punggol park connector is being resurfaced. Ridiculous. I loved it. At the end I got to see Pixie, Rachel's Pomeranian who is just a fluffy, flirty little ball of adorable.

path resurfacing - note sudden trail run segment!
you know you're a runner when yours are the muddiest shoes in the gym. oops.

- This year I ran a marathon in a time I didn't think I would ever see when I ran my first marathon four years ago. A time that starts with a 4. Rachel is training for the Tokyo Marathon and I told her what I think is the real secret (for a baby marathoner) to upping the mileage. Don't think, just run. Don't overthink it. Don't think, 'I'll be too tired for tomorrow morning's track workout or Thursday's tempo if I run tonight'. Don't think, just run easy (and the secret is to really run easy - something I'm working on myself).
For regular people with full-time jobs, this will hardly result in overtraining. Unless you're obsessive about it.

- On Sunday morning I started out running my usual canal route.

ZEBRA EXCAVATOR 

(Also for anyone who's counting: 2 grey herons, 4 striated herons, 4 little egrets, and 1 kingfisher. Yesterday was a good day for grey herons.)

 At the turn-off to Pandan Reservoir, I decided to go the other way instead on a whim, and found myself running to and through West Coast Park! I'm not really sure why it never occurred to me before. I run to West Coast Park. I run to the reservoir. For some reason I've never thought of connecting the two on foot. I am an idiot.

- On Sunday afternoon I was exactly five minutes late for a strength class at the gym (for very good reason: lunch and hanging out with a couple of friends) and, well, decided to do a short sharp run instead. (I'm allowing myself to do this because, remember, I have no training plan right now.) I found myself holding a pace, for a quick 5k, that five years ago I'd thought unimaginable but is now my happy tempo run pace. I've been running this for months now but the actual speed didn't occur to me until I saw the numbers on the treadmill.

Who is this person? I thought to myself. How did I get here? It was an important lesson that improvement takes time. I'm always impatient, always wanting to accomplish this or that, expecting to PR every goal race. It doesn't work that way.

- And what of this year's resolutions? The most important one, the one at the top of my list, the one about changing the ratio of positive thoughts to terrible slowpoke negative ones, that's doing fine. That's a work in progress.
The 5k PR didn't happen (not enough 5ks), nor did the 10k one or the half. Doesn't matter, they'll come. The tri and marathon PRs did; I spent a big chunk of the year focusing on City to Surf and I'm happy I did. Marathon training has completely broken my perspective on the definition of a short run and I'm quite glad for it. 

Left Behind

When you're one of the slowest members of the running group you train with, you try to stick to intervals. No one gets dropped when you're running laps around a track! I obediently stuck to intervals...until this past weekend.

One of the group members had semi-organised* a road-and-trail Christmas 'fun half' (*i.e., we had a rough idea of a route) - 21km or so up Rifle Range Road, a loop around Macritchie, and back down Rifle Range. Sounded fun, so I signed up.

Except. Only the fast people showed up on Saturday morning. Itsuko. Susan. Mark. Nynne. These are people with marathon PRs in the neighbourhood of 3 and a half hours. And me. I. Am. Not. A. Fast. Person. I think you can guess what happened next.

Can I just say - trying to do a long run with a group of people whose long run pace is an entire minute per km faster than yours is a terrrrrible idea.

Almost immediately, the group dropped me. Ten minutes later I spotted two of the other women in the distance and sped up a bit to catch up. Then they dropped me again. I gave up for a few minutes to take this photo and text our coach: "This was a baaaad idea."

20 minutes later I found the whole gang standing around at the end of the Rifle Range trail into Macritchie waiting for me to catch up. (I was trying to catch up, I swear. My knees are a mite annoyed at me now for sprinting every downhill and my left calf is upset with me for the uphills.) We ran a bit more with me at the (increasingly longer and longer) tail end. Then everyone stopped at the ranger station and I barely caught my breath before we were off again.

Nynne asked: 'Are you all right?'
I wanted to say, physically, yes; mentally, not so much...but I didn't have enough breath left to say much of anything.

After an hour of trying to catch up by desperate fartlek, I finally lost everyone altogether and lumbered away into the forest like a dying elephant for the benefit of the herd. I felt like a dying elephant too.

I don't blame the herd; I know it's very difficult to run slower than your natural long-run pace to wait for someone. And I felt awful for making everyone stop and start to wait for me. I'm sure real elephants have all sorts of rituals around a dying member of their herd, like covering them with leaves and stuff, but that'd just be mortifying.

In the end I wound up running a little bit more, clockwise around Macritchie, and sneaking out the Lornie Road trail exit to jump on a bus home - maybe 14km in total, I never really checked.

This isn't the first time I've been dropped, or DFL (dead _ing last) on a group run, and it's pretty depressing. I'd rather do a long run on my own than go out for what ought to be a social run and be left behind. I know the theory is that running with people who are faster helps you get better, but I think the idea is to run with people whose pace is in reach, not 'in your dreams'. And you wouldn't believe how hard it is to find people whose natural long-run pace is a middling ten-minute mile.

And what of those track sessions? I am getting faster...imperceptibly. It's just that everyone else is getting faster faster. Who knows, maybe I've reached those limits I keep trying to push. HELLO, ELEPHANT GRAVEYARD.

How do you handle getting dropped? Really, is there any way to make it less demoralising? 

Here, have some chocolate chip cookies. After my disastrous fartlek of a run I made these and took them to a friend's housewarming/ Christmas party. Mmm.  

A running tally

For the second year in a row (my blog is only one year old, okay) I'm doing Miss Zippy's Year of Running recap. Here goes:

- Best race experience?
Does it count as a race? The Hen Party Tutu-Wearing Chicken Run (aka the Pocari Sweat Run in June), with the blushing (ok - glowing...ok, all-out sweating) bride and the hen party crew. A run with, and for, friends.

- Best run? 
This may be a strange choice - but I'll have to say 24km on a treadmill during the Great Haze of 2013, which told me a few things about myself, my capacity to deal with boredom, and the nature of the universe. I developed the ability to hold multiple chat conversations on a phone with minimal typos. I may have seen my life flash before my eyes.
Also, the other day my run by the canal was like the 12 days of Christmas gone wrong: 4 little egrets, 3 spotted doves, 2 striated herons, 1 stray common sandpiper, and a very fit uncle on his unicycle. (He's a regular there - every other regular in the neighbourhood knows him by sight. So, any run on which I see Mr Unicycle Uncle is a pretty good one.

- Best new piece of gear? 
Tim(ex) III - my third Timex Ironman 30-lap watch in a row. I am a woman of extremely little gear. (Husband may disagree, citing overflowing gear drawers.) I've run for ten years and *STILL* don't own a GPS watch or heart-rate monitor... Mr Tim and my twice-yearly shoe purchases are about as technical as I get. My goggles are five years old. My swim caps are the latex freebies I get at races. Until perhaps two years ago I hadn't purchased any of my own running shirts (they were all free from races).

- Best piece of running advice you received? 
It's a tie: All of George Sheehan's 'Running and Being' (READ IT), and Holly bellowing "USE YOUR HAMSTRINGS" at the end of a rather rough sprint tri.

- Most inspirational runner? 
The most inspirational runners in my life will be, now and always, mum and dad. My mum runs 4.5km twice a day (you heard that right). She gets it done. (She claims not to enjoy it and doesn't race, but really she secretly likes to run.)
My dad doesn't run that much any more but if he could do his first marathon in his 40s with two kids I can certainly do it now. I'm told he finished those runs BEFORE taking me for our morning walks when I was little. The walks were at sunrise on a Sunday so I can only imagine what time he actually woke up.  

- If you could sum up your year in a couple of words, what would they be? 
Running is my antidote, my universal balm.

Meet Singapore's Rosie Ruiz.

[A quick aside: First of all, I'm seeing a few new readers coming over from the Venus Run blog-posts website. Welcome! 
I've actually signed up for the Venus Run again; it'll be on March 8 next year. 
It may start going downhill, end on a rather painful uphill, and involve a bright pink shirt, but other than that the event is well-organised and great fun. It's fairly small - registration is capped at 5,000. And there aren't many short sharp timed 5ks - I want to know whether I'm getting better at this distance over time.
NB - I pay for my own race entries.) 

Rosie Ruiz may just be the most famous runner to have not-won a marathon. In 1980, she notoriously cut the course of the prestigious Boston Marathon to nip in ahead of the real winner, Canadian runner Jacqueline Gareau. Fortunately two Harvard student spectators noticed her bursting out of the crowd near the end to enter the course, and exposed her as a fraud.

This year's Standard Chartered Marathon Singapore had its very own Rosie Ruiz, too, who is giving the original Rosie Ruiz a run (...or...not...?) for her money. Read this staggering story:

'Mystery 'winner' just wanted T-shirt and medal' 

Chua Siang Yee, The Straits Times, December 5, 2013 

PASTRY chef Tam Chua Puh admitted yesterday that he took a short cut in last Sunday's marathon, but said he never meant to be the first Singaporean to cross the finishing line.
When the unknown beat SEA Games-bound marathoner Mok Ying Ren to the top spot, it caused a two-hour delay as officials scrambled to check.
Mr Tam, 43, who ran barely 6km of the 42.195km route, told The Straits Times yesterday that he did not mean to cause any trouble. All he wanted was the finisher's T-shirt and medal.
In fact, he also admitted, he had done the same thing in two previous marathons, but was disqualified both years.
"I am sorry if I offended anyone. I never thought I would create so much inconvenience for the organisers," he said.
His explanation came three days after the controversy over his finishing time of 2hr 46min 57sec, well ahead of all the best Singaporean racers.
Emcees at the Standard Chartered Marathon Singapore initially declared him the winner of the Singapore men's category, before he was disqualified for missing all but one of the race checkpoints.
Racer Mok was then crowned the winner with a time of 2hr 54min 17sec.
Yesterday, Mr Tam said he had lasted only about 6km of the race and gave up because his left knee ached.
"I stopped at the Esplanade because my knee was too sore. I got hit by a car when I was 12, and my knee hasn't been okay since," he said.
But he was determined to collect his T-shirt and medal.
"After resting at the bus stop, I made my way back to the finishing line. I saw some Kenyans run past, and I thought I saw some local runners run past too, so I assumed it was safe to return to the race. I didn't expect to be the first Singaporean to finish."
The runners he spotted going past were the leading foreigners.
Mr Tam said he finished the 2011 and 2012 races the same way. Both times, he covered about 19km before giving up. Each time, he approached the medical vans and got a ride to the end point, where he resumed running and crossed the finishing line.
Asked if he did not think that was cheating, he said: "It never crossed my mind. Having signed up for the marathon, I just wanted to cross the finishing line."
Before last Sunday's race, he was issued a red bib, for runners expected to finish in more than five hours.
Married with one child, he said he picked up running in 2011 and runs mostly on weekends, 1km each time.
He seemed perplexed to be asked what possessed him to do what he did in the race.
"I never thought about going home midway. It would have been like giving up. I like running because I love nature, and I enjoy looking at the sights along the way. Winning never crossed my mind."

---

This is one of the most bizarre and funny race-bandit stories I've ever heard - I can't even get mad at the guy because he just sounds so spectacularly naive.

Here's something everyone ought to learn in kindergarten (what are kindergartens teaching these days??): if you don't finish the race, you shouldn't get the t-shirt and medal. That's why it's called a finisher tee. Would you drop out of a university course midway, show up for the graduation ceremony and then insist you should get the certificate because you paid to sign up? Um, no...

Second basic principle of running: If you're not trained for a full marathon, don't sign up for it!
You know, there is a 10km category. Maybe he thought that the 10km marathon was the same as the 42km marathon?

Even if you're just trying to complete a full marathon, you still have to train to complete the whole distance. That means running more than 1km at a time and more than just on weekends. If you don't want to put in that much time, there are lots of other shorter events that you can do safely.

Still more hilariously, he did the exact same thing twice before - in 2011 and 2012. And was disqualified both times. So here's where it gets serious: why didn't the organisers simply bar him from entering again?

Cutting a race course doesn't just hurt only the top Singaporean finishers. It hurts everyone who came in after you. That includes the local middle- and back-of-the-pack-ers (I am one) who've worked their butts off to actually train for this, no matter how long they take. It causes chaos for the runners and for the organisers.

It didn't help that the organisers' timing system really did fail to capture runners at certain checkpoints - reason number 2 I'm rather disappointed in the organisers of what is supposed to be Singapore's flagship marathon.

But where is this impulse to cheat - or naivete like Mr Tam's - coming from? We promote running as a great way to get healthy, to improve cardiovascular fitness, to lose some weight; and running is the biggest participant sport in Singapore. All that is terrific. But there is no one teaching Singaporeans about proper training, race ethics, or even ordinary running etiquette. Running is a broad church that welcomes all comers, but it looks as though sometimes it also needs to hold their hand.

Three things...Tuesday. Sorry, alliteration.

It's that time of the year again...the north-east monsoon. It's that time of the year when I start running out of dry running shoes. And I have three pairs. Yesterday I was running along the canal as usual, in the rain, everything getting soggy, when I saw a man running along...barefoot and holding an umbrella. At first I thought he was nuts, but after a while it all made perfect sense: why get your shoes soggy when you can avoid that by running barefoot? Why get yourself soggy when you can carry a brolly? I don't know what's normal around here any more.

Also, I just got back from India where I went to the wedding of two dear friends, enjoyed great company and amazing food, tottered around in yards and yards of fancy silk sari that someone else had to pin and tuck onto me, closed down a club partying late into the night in heels so tall that my right big toe has gone numb from too much dancing and still hasn't recovered, visited the world's largest mangrove area and saw crocodiles in the wild, and definitely did no running at all. You'll hear about that one later.

Meanwhile, in the spirit of Sesame Street, this post is brought to you by the number three.

Three things I'm enjoying this week: 

1. Relays - specifically the Standard Chartered Singapore Marathon ekiden relay: all the fun of a full marathon, with none of the work! okay - only a tiny little bit of the work. PS my team beat all the other teams from the office and now we are officially the fastest journalists in Singapore. Which isn't saying very much.

2. English singer-songwriter Jake Bugg.

3. This post from Wellfesto about '10 things I want my daughter to know about working out'. It's the very positive flip side to all my snarking about the messages that women today hear about their bodies and diets and exercise routines.

"I’ll never talk to my daughter about fitting into THAT DRESS.  But I will talk to her about what it sounds like to hear pine needles crunching under my feet and what it feels like to cross a finish line and how special it is to see the world on foot.  I will talk to her about hard work and self sufficiency.  I will teach her the joy of working out by showing her I love it.  And I’ll leave the rest up to her."

Three things people keep asking me about running for some reason so I thought I'd share some FAQ answers here:

1. Do you run every morning?

No, but I prefer to run in the morning because I KNOW I have at least half an hour free. I run about five days a week.

2. How many marathons do you do a year?
Usually just one! (A marathon is a very specific distance: 42.2 km. If you refer to 'a 5km marathon', 'a 10km marathon' and so on in front of me, I will smack you. Please also refer to this post for more details and entertaining gifs. And yes, you may also laugh at me for my complete lack of knowledge about other spectator sports.) 

3. How do I start? 

You don't need any specialised equipment, but do wear something comfortable - make sure your shoes are especially comfortable. Now put one foot in front of the other at anything faster than walking pace and do this for 1km.
Do you still feel fine? Do it for another km. If not, you can take a walk break, have a little drink (I mean water), or stop and rest.
Rinse and repeat.
This really is how I started running. 

The Great Eastern Women's Run - a race report

No matter what you think about women's-only races, the Great Eastern Women's Run is the best-organised road run in Singapore.

This year they really hit out of the ballpark. First of all, because the organiser Great Eastern Life is an insurance company...all the runners are covered during the race. There are massages and loads of food at the finish, and even a little clean-up station with wet wipes and deodorant and a mirror to check your hair (AFTER the race, when it totally makes sense, not before.)

And I love the way Great Eastern focuses on family/ friends/ fun rather than the kind of shape one is in. No tone-deaf fitspo here.

No, they aren't paying me to say this. I don't even have any insurance plans with them.

Thanks to some work trips, some crazy workweeks, and some decline of motivation (ahem) after hitting my marathon PR goal for the year, I was definitely undertrained going into this half marathon. Tempo runs? What tempo runs?

I had a half-hearted notion of PRing, as last year's time was about 2:11 while trying to ward off cramps. My plan was to go 6 minutes per km for the first 16km and, if I felt so inclined, to push harder for the last 5.

Long story short - I did not feel so inclined.

The loop-the-loop route involved running up and over Nicoll Highway...twice. And here is my biggest complaint about this race: when I tried doing lap splits on my watch at every kilometre marker, the first 8 'kilometres' took me 6 minutes, 6 minutes, 8 minutes (?), 3:40 (??), 7 minutes (???), 4 minutes(?!?!?), 6 minutes (phew, finally, a real kilometre), and 8 minutes (sorry, WTF? I know this works out to 6 min/km, but those markers are ridiculous.) And then I pulled the plug on the splits; they were getting too confusing. Dear Santa, can I have a GPS watch this year?

At about 13km the wheels fell off my 6min/km effort and I slowed down quite a bit (but sped up for the Holly-cheering point), staggering into the finish with a 2:14:34 gun time. Seriously, my legs didn't feel like moving that day. And I was h u n g r y. STARVING. I felt like I could have eaten an entire pizza on the run. I spent 5 km thinking about food. Hey, it was a nice distraction. Truly. One of my running mottoes is "There's chwee kuay at the end."

Oddly, despite all the food at the end, I didn't feel like actually putting any in my mouth, so I squirrelled an apple away for later.

I'm not terribly disappointed because the weather was terrific and I was having so much fun. My friend C completed her first half marathon (!!!!! this girl is going on to great things and I'm pretty sure she's addicted to running now) and S and A ran all the way without stopping to walk, and I'm incredibly proud of them.

And I even found my race pix. Not too unglam or shapeless for these photographers! Here you go.

I WILL NOT SMILE BECAUSE I'M TOO HUNGRY FOR THAT.

Too long, didn't read? 

The good:
Pretty good organisation
Race started on time
Great amenities
Focus on family/ friends/ health
Clearly marked route

The bad:
WTF, distance markers?
Nicoll Highway slopes...TWICE. (not as bad as the City to Surf hills, but I was not expecting inclines!)
Too many loops in the route (again, not as bad as the City to Surf hairpin turns)

In other news...
Last Friday was my birthday. On Friday morning I had a terrific run. On Friday night I somehow got out of work at 8pm and made it to a nice (not break-the-bank nice; just cosy) restaurant by 9pm...where they miraculously had a table free up right as we got there, without a reservation, at peak hour on a Friday night. Birthdays really are magic.

Oh, and thanks to my fantastic husband there's now ice cream cake in the freezer. (Every year he asks me what I want for my birthday; every year I say ice cream cake; every year I get an ice cream cake. Isn't life grand?)

On Saturday morning I had a nice run, too. Despite eating ice cream cake for breakfast.

A mystery
I've been running for AEONS, so when will my easy run pace get faster? Such a mystery. Ok, I admit, this week at track I dropped out two *hard* 400 reps short of a full set. (Yes Coach Shem, I'm more disappointed in me than you are. It's a good thing you already know how I feel about 400s, because I was too out of breath to complain.)

I've still got to figure out what my goals are for next year. Do I want to try for another marathon PR and the family marathon record? Or be a running buddy for a physically challenged runner? Or run half-marathons until I get to the elusive 1:58? Or volunteer at a race? Or do my first ultra? Or help Ken Jin grow the Singapore Glove Project? Or pace a friend? Who knows? Focus, crazy woman, focus.

But honestly? 
If I wasn't training for anything I would probably run between 5 and 10k maybe 5 times a week, and however far and fast I want to on weekends (10? 15?), just because it's quiet and peaceful and I love watching the sun rise while I run. And keep going to Tuesday track; I like those people. I reckon that sounds like a good plan for a while, what do you think?

Does anyone else have a drop in motivation after hitting a nice fat goal - like a marathon PR? I feel like I'd  focused so long on sub-5 that I don't feel like focusing all that hard for a while. Mentally, anyway. My legs are fine. 

How to go running in Taipei

Here is the short answer: Don't! The traffic is terrible in town and there isn't much pavement to speak of.

Also, I didn't have much time so I couldn't afford to get lost. I ended up doing most of my running in the hotel gym.

Source: this is a pretty good interview about motorbikes in Taipei.

I was there on a press trip with an international group of environment/ business journalists from the US, Australia, Thailand, Korea, Singapore, Poland, Turkey, Greece, Guam, Paraguay, Honduras, Spain, Portugal, Germany...have I forgotten anyone?

On the Saturday of the weekend I was there, I met up with my publication's correspondent in Taiwan, who asked me what I thought of the country. I think Singapore and Taiwan can learn a lot from each other, I said. Taiwan's pretty good at getting people to manage waste and recycle, and is very strong on environmental education... but their traffic is... '比较乱一点' ('a little messy'), I trailed off diplomatically. She roared.

So don't run. Maybe get on a bike instead.

Source: http://www.wantchinatimes.com/news-subclass-cnt.aspx?id=20131101000102&cid=1103

And eat a lot.

Shilin Night Market, probably the most touristy night market of them all; I had stinky tofu, oyster omelette, dumplings, a papaya milkshake, and shaved ice with red beans and peanuts. Not all at the same time, that'd be weird.

aforementioned stinky tofu - none of us died of it

Walk a lot. (Also: The subway system is great.)

we also got to go out to this reforested area called Dongyuanshan

Wear a hard hat. (Any day in which I get to wear a hard hat or be on a boat is an excellent workday. There was one time I was on a boat - okay, a very big ship - wearing a hard hat. Double win! Except for the time I was horribly seasick.)

Well, wear a hard hat and a quizzical expression, anyway.

Experience a real earthquake. (There was one in southeast Taiwan, which we felt a wee bit up north in Taipei.)

And take a lot of photos.

Why I'm proud of my unglam running photos

An open letter to 'Tekko', running photographer extraordinaire

Dear Mr Koh,

Thank you for your completely unsolicited advice on how to avoid unglam race photos.

(A warning to readers: if you click on the link, be prepared to throw up a little bit - between the grammar and the attitude. To save you the trouble, I'll summarise Mr Koh's sage advice for you here, after I run to the bathroom and hurl: 

"...For those ladies who are honest enough and admit that they do look unglam in their running pose, here are some tips on how to look glam:
1. Put on some make up. 
2. Tie up your hair. 
3.[Wear sunglasses to avoid the shut-eyed or slit-eyed look.]  
4. And last but not least, smile.")  

First of all, some of that is terrible advice.
- Wearing makeup while running is actually bad for your skin. Sunscreen, however, is recommended.
- I don't know how anyone with long hair can run with it untied anyway; won't it get everywhere?
- I'll wear sunglasses when the sun is in my eyes, thanks.
- No, I will not smile on demand just for you, honey. Go stick that lens where the sun don't shine.

Next, your post is totally insulting to any serious runner - male or female. I don't know about you, but I don't run to look glamorous while running. I run because I love to run. I love the way I feel while moving fast with the sun on my skin and the wind in my hair. I run to become a better runner.

I'm proud of every single one of my race photos. Even if it looks like I'm barely moving in some of them. Even if my hips are sagging and my hair is plastered to my face (you should see the triathlon photos of swim-cap hair/ helmet head, that's worse) and my form sucks at the end of a long run. If I look unglam and sweaty, that's because I'm actually working hard. I've worked very hard for some PRs lately and you're not allowed to belittle that.

It's a race, not a fashion show. Okay, so maybe some of us are in fact running to get into shape - none of your beeswax. I know you shot Shape, which is an all-women's race, but you don't get a free pass on the sexist attitude because of that. So your glamour shot examples consist of conventionally beautiful, slim women? I'm a runner, I have leg muscles. Sorry I'm not sorry. I wonder, if you were shooting at the Army Half Marathon, would you be complaining about unglam army boys too?

But either way, glam or unglam, that's none of your business as a race photographer. YOUR job as a race photographer is to snap action shots, not fashion shots. You're supposed to capture the full agony and ecstasy of running. (It wouldn't be called a race if it didn't involve *some* pain.) And if you're not capable of doing that, what kind of photographer are you?

Finally, what gets to me the most is that your 'advice' is completely unsolicited. You didn't offer it because someone complained to you about hideous race photos and asked what they could do about them. (Photoshop. Or don't run, perhaps.) You're offering it because YOU think we don't look 'glam' enough for YOUR taste.

Do I give a flying fish what you think I look like while running? Not one bit. So please keep your nose out of it - or next race, you can get a pretty little photo of pretty little me flipping you the pretty little bird.

Sincerely,

The Genetically Challenged Athlete

PS: Later edit: it was Holly who first alerted me to the original post. Her post is awfully polite.
Fit and Feminist puts it better than I ever will.

I genuinely appreciate the time and effort put in by race photographers - who instead of running into a breeze have to stand out there in the hot sun for hours and hours. I especially appreciate the ones who volunteer - you're all heroes! But I don't care if my unglam photos ruin someone's album.

PPS: Husband, on reading the offending post: "Wow, I dunno why some guys think it's okay to say really stupid things if they add 'hurhur' or 'don't take it so seriously' afterward." So that's pretty much my final word on it - that was some really stupid advice. It's a blog, feel free to disagree. Ok, I'm done now!