Monday, March 11, 2019

WWYD, winter blahs edition


Ever since having Thing 2 I've been mentally ready to go chase down some big fat juicy running goals.  However, the spirit may be willing, but the flesh is weak: I can't even seem to get back to running consistently, never mind train for anything. Work has been crazy, baby has been sniffly, and I don't like running on lunch break because it seems to affect my pumping output (formula is great, after 6 months it's just another food, but I want to give baby as much breastmilk as possible for the immune benefits). Last week when I sprained my ankle and had to sit indoors on the spin bike in otherwise perfect running weather, it felt like the final straw. 

I see people all over the place hopping back into running 6 or 7 months after having babies, and I'm thinking: what's wrong with me? Am I just not disciplined enough? Do I just not want it enough?

I don't really have a good excuse. The baby, when she's not congested or teething, is a pretty good sleeper. I know how important it is to be consistent so that when I'm ready to actually start training, I can just jump right in. 'Training to train', if you will. But also, the thing I love most about running - being able to run outdoors - I can't do on weekdays before evening at the moment. So a lot of my runs are at 10pm on the treadmill and I'm like, I am finding zero joy in this, what even is the point? I'm not shooting for any PRs right now, let alone actual running goals like qualifying for Boston*.

*also with the way that qualifying times are going, if I keep getting faster at my current pace and the times get tightened at their current pace, the two will converge and I'll line up in Hopkinton in roughly 15-25 years, which is so ridiculous I can't believe I'm even typing this or admitting that I would like to run Boston someday. 

I don't really have a good answer to this. If I sign up for something and try to follow an actual training plan, chances are I wouldn't be able to actually follow the plan more than 50% of the time, and I'd get frustrated and fed up. Let's face it, my training-plan compliance is about 85% in a good cycle. In the business-as-usual scenario, I'll keep doing these short sporadic runs I don't enjoy, and get frustrated and fed up with my own lack of consistency. What would you do? What tweaks would you make to my systems? 

2 comments:

  1. Aw, I'm sorry it's tough. I think you just have a lot to juggle! But when you have the time, and energy, you have the fitness base and you'll get right back into it.

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  2. I don't have any good answers. But, I do just want to pop in to say, sometimes the desire for big goals & hardcore-for-serious training just plain does not align with what's going on in life. And that sucks but it's totally fine to go, "You know, this isn't the time," & give yourself permission to do the bare minimum that you can manage for the time being and go back to big goals later when life is being more cooperative. (My life is currently not cooperating, and I'm finding a lot of peace & relief & just admitting that & being okay with doing what I can, comfortably, without stressing about some big goals I'd previously been focused on.) I hope things get better soon!

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